Over the course of my 5 years at Queen’s (including a semester abroad in Edinburgh, Scotland), I’ve lived with over 20 different people in various living arrangements. Here are some of the key things I’ve taken away from my experiences.
1. Communicate proactively, not reactively. It is always easier to handle a situation before it actually arises. You should make sure to be clear with your housemates from the get go about your boundaries and living style, that way you avoid a situation where you become increasingly frustrated by something your housemate does, but they continue to do it because they don’t know it frustrates you. Make sure you are not just communicating your boundaries, but also actively listening to the boundaries of your housemates.
2. Deal with issues in person, not over text or in a group chat. While it may be tempting to shoot off a text to the house group chat when your housemates leave a sink full of dirty dishes sitting for a few days (and there may be urgent/time-sensitive situations where a text is appropriate), generally it is better to talk out any issues in person. This allows you and your housemates to communicate without worrying about the possible passive-aggressive tone of someone’s text or waiting hours between replies. Try to deal with issues as soon as you can, since letting small things build up can build resentment!
3. Be open to new ideas. Living with housemates means you are living with people who come from all sorts of different backgrounds and have different values, beliefs, habits, ideas, and ways of living than you. It can be a really wonderful opportunity to learn things from your housemates - so keep an open mind and always be respectful towards your housemates!
4. Establish house rules early! Similar to the first tip, you should set a time with your housemates when you move in to discuss and set some house rules about things like noise, parties, cleaning, having people over, and more. You should also discuss shared finances - how will you split the cost of things like toilet paper, soap, dish detergent, etc. You might also want to do a house meeting once a month to check in with each other, that way if someone is less comfortable bringing up their concerns by themself, they can still be heard.